Unicorn Poop

Good news!  Kidlet has been released from the hospital, just in time for her birthday.  She was so happy to get back both to the kibbutz where she boards and to school.  She couldn’t come home for the weekend, so today we went to the kibbutz to visit her.

I wanted to bring something special, and found just the thing.  Unicorn poop.  Yes indeed.

A quick lesson.

A unicorn (from Latin unus ‘one’ and cornu ‘horn’) is a mythological creature. Though the modern popular image of the unicorn is sometimes that of a horse differing only in the horn on its forehead, the traditional unicorn also has a billy-goat beard, a lion’s tail, and cloven hooves—these distinguish it from a horse.   Many magical properties have been attributed to the unicorn.

Among other things, it seems to be a somewhat common theory that unicorns fart rainbows.

Well, if such is the case, then it was only a matter of time until someone made the correlation to unicorn poop.

First posted to instructables.com by Kristy Lynn, unicorn poop recipes have been reblogged all over the web in the past month.  Carrie on carrie’s creations tweaked it around a bit and posted a tutorial, which I was happy to follow.  So early this morning up out of bed I stumbled to start baking.

Basically, it’s a simple sugar cookie recipe – carrie has a good one, but any recipe will do.

(I accidentally left one ingredient out of the picture – but luckily not out of the recipe.  Can you guess which?)

Next come the colours.  Rainbows, remember?  You can use the regular drops of food dye from the supermarket, but it’s recommended to use the more professional food colouring gels, as they provide more vivid colours.  The best known brand in Wilton’s, which – wonder of wonders – I was able to find in a specialty shop.  They didn’t have all the colours I wanted from Wilton’s, but they had another gel I could use.  A very little goes a very long way, so I may be colouring lots of food for a while….  It’s a good idea to use gloves, or knead very carefully, as the dye does get on your hands.  Not as much with the gel, but some.

Once the cookie dough was properly chilled, I divided it up into more or less equal portions, and dyed each portion – yellow, blue, green, purple, and pink.  (Yeah, I know, I hate pink, but it seemed to me to be necessary for unicorn poop.  At least it’s a dark pink.)

Next step is making long skinny snakes out of each colour.  I used a little bit of dough at a time, keeping the rest of the dough in the fridge so it wouldn’t get all gloopy (technical term)  and sticky on me.

Now you stack the snakes together.

…and roll them up just enough to make a rope but not to mush the colours together…

Then twist the rope…

…and coil up lengths of the twisted rope to make little piles of poop!

I don’t have a big oven, only a little toaster oven, and for some reason the poops needed more time to bake than what the recipe calls for.  I left them in about 12 minutes.

I decorated some of the poops with little flowers

and some with teeny hearts

The recipe calls for a shiny gel, which I couldn’t find in the shop.  I also thought about making them sparkly, but the edible glitter was very expensive.  I later realised I could have just sprinkled sugar on them to make them sparkle.  I will definitely try that on the next batch of poop I bake.

And voila!  Lovely tasty little unicorn poops!

Wrapped them all up and drove off to visit kidlet.

They were a big hit at her house, although when they asked me what I had brought and I said “unicorn poop” there was a bit of an awkward silence.  But when I unwrapped the plate they oohed and aahed and were quite enthusiastic.  I explained about unicorn farts, etc.  (For some reason kidlet felt the need at this point to explain that I was somewhat strange….)

And there you have it, parents.  If you ever want to absolutely confirm to your teenagers that you are weird, make unicorn poop for them and for their friends.   All teens may think it, but this will remove all doubt from their minds.  Kinda cool, yes, but definitely weird.    I love it.

A note:  this recipe makes soft, chewy cookies, which is only proper.  Partner commented on this, as she prefers crunchy cookies.  I said for heaven’s sake, poops aren’t crunchy.  At least I hope not.  Ouch.

As Kristy Lynn wrote in her original post:

The amount of poops that you will get from this recipe depends on how big your unicorn is.

I thought about doubling the recipe collecting a herd of unicorns, but decided against it in the end.  My unicorn made about 40 poops total.

Happy birthday, kidlet!!!  Love you!


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3 Responses to “Unicorn Poop”

  1. Courtney Says:

    Ha ha! Thanks for the tutorial. I’m sure unicorn poop would be a big hit with our resident four-year-old, who has been rather obsessed with potty humor since beginning kindergarten last fall.

    I’m glad kidlet is out of the hospital and had a good birthday!

    • eclecticitee Says:

      But you see, if you make poop for a 4-yr-old, he thinks Mom is super-super cool. Make it for a 17-yr-old, and she thinks Mom is definitely weird…(only secretly will she admit that’s it’s also pretty cool…maybe)

  2. Roberta Says:

    Happy, so happy for kidlet and you too! Happy birthday kidlet!!!

    And now I want some unicorn poo too.. ^_-

    I think making these cookies was a great idea!

    Hugs 🙂

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